I am a big fan of this site and am thinking of adapting it for use in children's ministry. I pray for each and every secret.
And in keeping with the theme of secrets and confessions, I have to admit that I would like to write on this blog a few more of my frustrations with ministry and even seek advice on what to do about situations at work, but I don't due to a fear of someone at work reading it or any other retribution of writing about them. I am a little more candid than most of my friends (I actually admitted that I hated VBS, and man, the negative feedback I got from that offline--seems you just can't be honest anymore, since being 'negative' is such a sin ). Still, there are things that come up that I just don't write about. Think, though, of the support and help we could give each other as ministry professionals if we could just be totally honest on a blog.
Am I the only one who holds back?
7 comments:
Let me say that I agreed with your post about VBS and we're not doing it this year. We're using our culture of artist in our church and community to help children worship God through Art!
Also let me say you are not the only one who holds back. Sometimes I just want to say exactly what's on my mind. But I can't. But I can here on yours since no one from my church would probably see this.
The art thing is what I'm thinking about for next year. We've got a lot of artists in the church and, since we're close to NASA, we've got a host of engineers and scientists, so I was thinking about incorporating that, too. It's all a big blur for now, but I'd love to hear more about what you did this year. I'll check out your blog.
You don't have to post this in case you decide to do it but you might find the forums at Kidology a place to "vent" under a new code name. :)
I appreciate your honesty and share your feelings about VBS.
Read your comments on VBS and thought you would get heat from them. I definitely agree with some of your thoughts. I can completely relate to not being able to fully vent and deal with the day to day frustrations we have in CM. I have been burned in the past by venting to someone I thought I could trust, turns out I couldn't and I learned a valuable lesson...painfully.
Yeah, well the flack I got was because I voiced those opinions aloud and not just on the blog, but I was raised to be honest and forthright, and I stand by my assertions.
And really, the "flack" was more just some ruffled feathers from "we've always done it this way" people, which happens anytime you make changes in ministry.
But my question to all is what integrity do we have if we tiptoe around things? I believe that my VBS post was stated diplomatically, and I think you should be tactful about your opinions, but how much integrity do you have if you aren't honest and just keep the status quo?
And furthermore, what does it say about us, Christians, if we can't accept venting or can't accept something we don't want to hear?
Why is saying that we disagree with something or don't like something so bad?
I understand where you are coming from. I often feel like I am (and all those in ministry) are held to a different standard. If we vent we are being negative and hurting the unity of the church.
This double standard has been transfered to my children as well. My 4 year old was recently disciplined by one of my volunteers very harshly for coloring on a table during his class. It was hard to seperate the "mommy feelings" and urge to protect, from being a leader and holding my volunteer accountable to the discipline policies I have established. The volunteer felt that since his Mom was the CM then he should know better, no grace for the fact that he is 4 and half of the other kids colored on the table.
Making changes in CM is usually met with resistance, I find I have to have a lengthy list of why just to justify it to some of my volunteers in order to get buy in. I welcome their feedback about what works and what doesn't and use their experience to make decisions. I try to be patient change is hard for most people, and they are comfortable with "
the way we always do it".
I agree that we need to be authentic, and be able to constructively say ok this is no longer working, it was great 30 years ago but now it is time for change. I am always evaluating what we do based on my "target audience". If we are not reaching the kids by the methods we use it is time for new methods. If we agree with everything then there is something wrong and we are possible being complacent.
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